The Big Five

Gabriel,

You're five and I'm in denial.

It feels like yesterday that I labored to bring you into the world, yesterday that I held you for the first time, weeping from the emotion of it all, kissing all over your sweet little face. And now you're five. Break my heart.

You changed my life. You made me a mama. You made me who I am.

And every day, you shape me into more of who I'm supposed to be.

I am learning how to love better, deeper, more fully. I am learning patience (very slowly, I will admit). I am learning how to think of myself less and others more.

I'm also learning other things -- like the names of dinosaurs, facts about wildlife and aquatic animals, and so many (so. many.) Star Wars backstories -- things I never thought very important or interesting, but I learn them so that I will have an answer when you ask.

Because ask you will. You love to learn more than anyone I know, which I guess you get from me. In fact, you get a lot from me. Some good stuff, some not-so-good stuff. Your dad and I, we like to say that you got his mind, my personality, and both of our good looks. ;)

And anything you got from me, anything not great? We can work on that stuff together, with God's help.

You, my precious boy, are an overcomer. You are strong and brave and confident and humble and kind. You are a deadly arrow. You are a mighty man of God. It doesn't matter if you don't see yourself as any of those things now. It doesn't even matter if I don't. What matters is that's who He has called you to be, and by His grace, that's who your dad and I will raise you to be.

I often tell your dad that there's nothing he can't do. Out of all the people in the world, I truly believe that about him. You are cut from that same cloth. You can accomplish anything you want, be anything you want. The sky really is your limit.

And you will always, always, always have a praying mama behind you.

Yesterday, you sweetly asked to read your brand-spanking-new real Bible (thanks Nana and Papaw!) then you asked to sleep with it -- melt my heart! Of course we said yes. I used to get scared at night, just like you, and I liked to sleep with my Bible under my pillow, too.

I pray you soon recognize the power in that book and that you always treasure its words above everything else. May His Word continually guide and guard your feet and your heart and may you never stray from its commands. May it become a foundation for you to build your life upon. May you find life and love and hope in its pages as the Spirit reveals himself to you through them.

I love you, son.

Love,
Your Mama

Some of my favorite pictures of your fifth year.